Nervous Nerd Verse: Super Uncool Poetry

The rumours are true, my inspiration for these cartoons has been in a serious dry spell.  And like all dry spells, it's a bad one.
Then today, as I was sitting in Starbucks with my notebook and moustache writing like a pretencious artist, I came across some utterly uncouth poems that I wrote over a year ago for a regular comedy show in Edmonton called Hangtime (shout out!).  The theme was the human body, and I went on the show and read a few of these.  I was really into biology in high school (I almost went into Sciences.  What?!), in case you couldn't tell that I have an interest.  And this is what results when that appreciation smashes my geekdom in the face with pen and ink.

So here they are.  And if anyone who reads these never speaks to me again, I understand completely.  Just know that I am posting these out of desperation and with great hesitation.

This one I wrote today.  Nerd.

And.....the worst one.  Let this be a warning, you may want to stop here else you learn something.  Like how you don't ever want to associate with me again.  

Good day.

Brilliant Decisions of the 21st Centrury: The Superbad Morning After

I started this cartoon a couple of weeks ago when I was sitting at home with a hangover because my friend Kevin and I decided to play a drinking game to the movie Superbad.  The game was drink everytime an F-Bomb was dropped.  Needless to say, we lasted 45 minutes and then we had to pause because we were both smashed.  But we finished a 26 of vodka (dear lord!), and then proceeded to watch a documentary (produced by Ricki Lake) about midwives vs. hospital births.  I learned a lot.  And then slept over at Kevin's.  The next morning, Kevin got up and went to work and I couldn't leave yet becuase I was not quite functional.  An hour later, I looked like this:

Something like a limping, smelly crack whore.  It was one of the prouder moments of my adult life.  Also, I'm never drinking again.