Nervous Nerd Verse: Super Uncool Poetry

The rumours are true, my inspiration for these cartoons has been in a serious dry spell.  And like all dry spells, it's a bad one.
Then today, as I was sitting in Starbucks with my notebook and moustache writing like a pretencious artist, I came across some utterly uncouth poems that I wrote over a year ago for a regular comedy show in Edmonton called Hangtime (shout out!).  The theme was the human body, and I went on the show and read a few of these.  I was really into biology in high school (I almost went into Sciences.  What?!), in case you couldn't tell that I have an interest.  And this is what results when that appreciation smashes my geekdom in the face with pen and ink.

So here they are.  And if anyone who reads these never speaks to me again, I understand completely.  Just know that I am posting these out of desperation and with great hesitation.

This one I wrote today.  Nerd.

And.....the worst one.  Let this be a warning, you may want to stop here else you learn something.  Like how you don't ever want to associate with me again.  

Good day.